Giving up control

Just so you aren't feeling left out I should let you know that the other day I made my blog private as I attempted to apply for an annulment. After talking to a lawyer yesterday that isn't going to happen. I guess if I were rich & famous it wouldn't be an issue, but the lawyer said it wasn't worth my money to attempt. I guess I can be thankful that he wasn't trying to take all my money. I am thankful that I did talk to a lawyer as I'm now back in charge of my life. I turned in my paperwork to the court today & now I just have to wait for my husband to return his portion to me then I'll turn the rest into the courts & then we just cross our fingers that it isn't rejected.

With that said I've been quite stressed out lately. Mostly due to the unknown and trying to do it all on my own.  I admit it I'm a total control freak sometimes and due to finally coming to realize this I put my husband in control of filing for divorce since he continually complained that he had no control in our relationship.  Looking back I regret giving up control and asking him to file for divorce.  I really thought it would save me stress and money, but realized that I picked a bad time to give up control.  It didn't save me any money, it ended up costing me more as I needed to pay a lawyer to sort things out and I was more stressed not being in control.

Last time things were so much easier. I totally trusted my husband. I knew about all of our finances and had no fears that he was hiding anything from me. This time I know nothing. I had no access to any of his financials and feared I would be held responsible for his large amount of debt. So as easy as it would seem to just use find and replace on my last divorce paperwork it's just not easy.  So after hitting rock bottom the other week I finally sucked it up and made an appointment with a lawyer. Then stressed all week till it happened.

I'm glad I sucked up and let go of control and went to see a lawyer. He reviewed all my paperwork and told me what to do next. He also let me know that I do have control of the divorce and I can take charge and file the remaining paperwork. I don't have to just sit on my ass crossing my fingers that my husband will fill out and turn in all the papers needed to finalize the divorce.

Things still aren't quite smooth sailing from here as I still need to acquire paperwork from my husband to finalize the divorce and he seems to want to fight me on every request.  

I could just let him do it his way, but I don't want this to drag out past 6 months and 1 day from when he initially filed and that is what will happen because he doesn't know what he needs to turn in or how to fill it out.  Not that I'm an expert or anything, but I am happy to pay a lawyer to tell me what I need and double check my paperwork to prevent as much as possible for it to be rejected.  I have to say, I like giving up control when you know it's in the hands of an expert.  So as much as I am a control freak sometimes I will happy pass on the reigns if you can prove you know more then me and I feel I can trust you.